Heyo Darth. Ok just a quick note today.
The ongoing nightmare continues, of course. I know you "have foreseen" all of this, but I'll give you the skinny just in case you missed the shit going on with my computers here somehow.
Anyway, first off I got a brand spanking new Acer Aspire 7736Z. Great machine! Unfortunately, for some reason, after I installed Visual Studio and other development software the display driver decided it was time to do the old Flicker Trick on me. It was fine before, but now it goes into a variety of different colors, and/or half the screen gets rubbed out with those silly little gray lines and stuff. Yay! That's so fun Darth! Yay! Thank you!! It's so great! Now I can spend another few days trying to figure out what your software did to the display driver! Woohoo! This is how I love to spend my time! How'd you know!? Oh yeah... that whole Force Vision thingie. Ok so can you "Foresee" what I'm doing with my middle finger right now?
Thanks again for all the great work you do! Please keep it up. Not enough suicides among the developers quite yet. Not to worry, I'm sure with a few more releases of the "new and improved" shit, you'll drive all development over seas where incompetent morons of various nationalities can do all of your shining bright development for you, and be driven mad by the defects in your products instead of us. That will be much better. Well, a lot cheaper for you, anyway. So best wishes with your Galactic Conquest and all. I'll touch base again when something else exciting happens. Won't be long, I'm pretty sure.
Sincerely, your fan,
Darth Developer
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Monday, June 28, 2010
Dear Darth #4
Oh heya Darth, old buddy. Wazz-up!? Things here are good, man. I'm going to do some more work on my computer tonight. It's great. I love all this new stuff, like on the interwebs and stuff. Picasa is great. Nice and simple, does most of what I want and does it pretty easily and with some flare. Good job on that. It's nice.
oh wait. that was google. never mind.
So anyway, everything is good, except the stupid fucking goddam fucking *spittle* Windows OS is driving me cracky, as usual. Man, just once I'd like to get home and use one of my fucking five computers without it vomiting up some goddam waste-of-my-precious-time issue or other. It's like the worst ongoing drag in the world, man. I gotta hang in there, yeah, I know, Darth. We all do. It's not like there's much choice left out there. You were just way smart on that one. No one does all the stuff you do. But then again, you own the OS, and from there it's not all so hard, is it? So I guess you're all like, "wow, I like totally rule and shit. This is Awesome. I can totally fuck with people's machines and put out shit on a stick and they kinda have to buy it cause everyone else has it. Nice. I rock."
It's great and everything that we have all this technology, though. It really is. I can do dumb silly stuff and throw it up on the interweb easy. I can even spell check. Not bad. Its really just that all of my computers are at various degrees of totally fucked up. That's all. So each evening is spent doing a little work, or some work I didn't intend to do, and filled with the jolly little joys of going to Google (you remember them, right?), to look up the goddamn error codes so I can sit here and spend three fucking hours figuring out what the hell went wrong with some gizmo or activex thingie or driver version, or downloading the service packs six times a week, or whatever. It's all just become a big old gigantic drag, man.
Even though in the end, after all that shit, you do finally have something to put online and show to your friends and family.
Look everyone! Pictures from my vacation! Yay!!
Sincerely, yer pal,
Darth Developer
oh wait. that was google. never mind.
So anyway, everything is good, except the stupid fucking goddam fucking *spittle* Windows OS is driving me cracky, as usual. Man, just once I'd like to get home and use one of my fucking five computers without it vomiting up some goddam waste-of-my-precious-time issue or other. It's like the worst ongoing drag in the world, man. I gotta hang in there, yeah, I know, Darth. We all do. It's not like there's much choice left out there. You were just way smart on that one. No one does all the stuff you do. But then again, you own the OS, and from there it's not all so hard, is it? So I guess you're all like, "wow, I like totally rule and shit. This is Awesome. I can totally fuck with people's machines and put out shit on a stick and they kinda have to buy it cause everyone else has it. Nice. I rock."
It's great and everything that we have all this technology, though. It really is. I can do dumb silly stuff and throw it up on the interweb easy. I can even spell check. Not bad. Its really just that all of my computers are at various degrees of totally fucked up. That's all. So each evening is spent doing a little work, or some work I didn't intend to do, and filled with the jolly little joys of going to Google (you remember them, right?), to look up the goddamn error codes so I can sit here and spend three fucking hours figuring out what the hell went wrong with some gizmo or activex thingie or driver version, or downloading the service packs six times a week, or whatever. It's all just become a big old gigantic drag, man.
Even though in the end, after all that shit, you do finally have something to put online and show to your friends and family.
Look everyone! Pictures from my vacation! Yay!!
Sincerely, yer pal,
Darth Developer
Monday, June 14, 2010
Dear Darth #3
Heyo Darth, my man, wazzup n shit?
Dude, I gotta tell you, man that YOU are Da MAN! Except for inventing Windows, you are the BEST. Of course you know I don't want to complain an shit because I know how personal you take this shit, but dude, my dude, you totally suck. Let me tell you why before you fry my ass with your wandy sword force thingie.
So I get home and I have all this shit I wanna do on my computer. But dude, every fucking time I turn around it's fucking giving me some sort of goddam fucking error message about this, or that, or something, or another thing or something over there and all this fucking SHIT, dude. And this is you're fucking fault man. I can't just get home and do some work. Nooo, that's too fucking much to ask from an overpriced buggy fucking OS, like Windows (whatever the version - every single goddam one of them has a billion fucking bugs).
Nope, so I get home and I want to download a file from my camera and you know kinda play with it and stuff for my blog. And I get this mutherfucking error when I'm trying upload it to the old hard drive.
My hard disk is full. WTF?
DUDE! Can you possibly not waste a fucking half hour of my fucking time by checking to see what the fuck the size of the file is BEFORE you start downloading it so that that the OS can say "HEY STUPID MUTHFUCKER - YOU'RE OUT OF DISK SPACE AND THIS FILE WON'T FUCKING FIT! OK?? YOU WANT ME TO COME OVER THERE AND KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS?? GET A BIGGER FUCKING HARD DRIVE YOU STUPID FUCK!" and then I could just go order one and be like "damn, that puter had the fucking lock and me and shit - that's badass." but NO. Instead your stupid fucking computer with Windows is like "Oh it's like a half hour into the download and woah... gee I forgot to check but dingit all, wouldn't you know I ran out of space. oh darn. No, can't be bothered to give you any options, sorry. Just a stupid fucking error. here you go." *Vomit Error Message*.
Ok, that's all for now, big guy. I would go into my rant about how you destroyed the whole fucking planet with your stupid Death Star OS, but what the fuck. I'm going to try to clear some disk space and see if I can upload that file for my fucking blog.
Keep up the good work there Darth. No hard feelings. Just do me a favor and try to suck a little less sometimes, ok?
Thanks!
Your fan,
Darth Developer
Dude, I gotta tell you, man that YOU are Da MAN! Except for inventing Windows, you are the BEST. Of course you know I don't want to complain an shit because I know how personal you take this shit, but dude, my dude, you totally suck. Let me tell you why before you fry my ass with your wandy sword force thingie.
So I get home and I have all this shit I wanna do on my computer. But dude, every fucking time I turn around it's fucking giving me some sort of goddam fucking error message about this, or that, or something, or another thing or something over there and all this fucking SHIT, dude. And this is you're fucking fault man. I can't just get home and do some work. Nooo, that's too fucking much to ask from an overpriced buggy fucking OS, like Windows (whatever the version - every single goddam one of them has a billion fucking bugs).
Nope, so I get home and I want to download a file from my camera and you know kinda play with it and stuff for my blog. And I get this mutherfucking error when I'm trying upload it to the old hard drive.
My hard disk is full. WTF?
DUDE! Can you possibly not waste a fucking half hour of my fucking time by checking to see what the fuck the size of the file is BEFORE you start downloading it so that that the OS can say "HEY STUPID MUTHFUCKER - YOU'RE OUT OF DISK SPACE AND THIS FILE WON'T FUCKING FIT! OK?? YOU WANT ME TO COME OVER THERE AND KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS?? GET A BIGGER FUCKING HARD DRIVE YOU STUPID FUCK!" and then I could just go order one and be like "damn, that puter had the fucking lock and me and shit - that's badass." but NO. Instead your stupid fucking computer with Windows is like "Oh it's like a half hour into the download and woah... gee I forgot to check but dingit all, wouldn't you know I ran out of space. oh darn. No, can't be bothered to give you any options, sorry. Just a stupid fucking error. here you go." *Vomit Error Message*.
Ok, that's all for now, big guy. I would go into my rant about how you destroyed the whole fucking planet with your stupid Death Star OS, but what the fuck. I'm going to try to clear some disk space and see if I can upload that file for my fucking blog.
Keep up the good work there Darth. No hard feelings. Just do me a favor and try to suck a little less sometimes, ok?
Thanks!
Your fan,
Darth Developer
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